Chapter 3: Perspective Shift

Perspective: A particular attitude towards something, or a viewpoint.

A friend of mine recommended the book "Oh, Shift" after I fought with a now estranged friend of mine. From my perspective, the situation between him and I was toxic on both sides, and he was not caring, and there was a lack of communication. I recognized my contribution and was willing to improve. I viewed that on his side he was not. Due to my PTSD from my previous relationship, I saw things from a different perspective. I saw only the red flags. I saw the words RUN, or PUSH AWAY — anything to get the emotional pain to stop. What's worse, I was an INFJ on the Myers Briggs test. Meaning I am sensitive, easily hurt and my perspective shapes my world and my actions.

So how do we learn to be more aware as another friend asked me?

Well, I will tell you, but you're not going to like it, and it will leave you a bit broken.

To change your perspective you need to take off you 'r self-created glasses and see it from another angle. You need to understand that what you might have done, or how you handle things is not productive. You need to be able to see, why things are going on. Instead of looking at things as black and white or my case Middle Ground Grey, my signature color.

Once you recognize how your distorted view the world, affects your actions you need to change how you approach things. This will affect your world view and outcomes in the future. One example is, I used to second guess myself, and this lead to fear or making the wrong decision and getting hurt or worse hurting others. I hated conflict, yet desired desperately to meet a resolve anytime it came up. It had to happen, for me to be happy. If it were not addressed, I would obsess on fixing it.

Once I realized this was not required for me to lead a happy life, I threw away this harmful perspective. Realizing that I did not need to allow the mere existence of conflict or disharmony to steer the directional course of my life, I began to step out with courage against the things, stopping me from my experience. I vowed to not let it affect me. This changed how I felt about the conflict, how I viewed myself and what I decided to do. I made a choice, to let people dislike me, to have opinions and to still do what I wanted to do with my life.

Changing your perspective can allow you to change your emotions. How we feel tends to affect what we do and how we see things. So change the way you view those around you, and the feelings shall follow. They are valid, just sometimes not accurate from time to time. Emotions are in the moment, and subject to change, our actions can not once they are produced.

Changing our actions thus will improve our outcomes and lives. Once we chouse a more harmonious action, karma becomes a massive factor in our lives. As an empath, I can tell you that the energy we put out into the world indeed does affect others, and their actions. ( now say this with me, WE ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FEELINGS AND ACTIONS OF OTHERS!!!) However, the less we react, and the more we respond we can achieve more personal peace in our lives.

So go forth, check your self and live from the heart.